Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I will die if light touches me.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
