Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Randomize
