How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
