can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize