he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
