Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
