he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Why did my mother make you get naked?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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