May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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