Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
