and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
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