so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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