if i can run in heels then i can drive
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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