It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
My bed is full of blood and feathers
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
