Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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