Just cropdusted the office
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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