so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
