Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
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