Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(817): View more from Texas

If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.

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(813): View more from Florida

i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license

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(727): View more from Florida

And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..

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(805): View more from California

he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me

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(310): View more from California

Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING

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(303): View more from Colorado

I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it

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(865): View more from Tennessee

He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"

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(925): View more from California

You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.

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