We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Randomize
