I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I'm like, not good at living.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
