The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
