Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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