I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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