they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
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