do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
When are your genitals available?
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
