Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I have already put on my inside pants.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
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