better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
