The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
you made out with another girl for some wings
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
