You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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