It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Randomize