So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
