please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
You're like the curious george of whores
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
