"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize