You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
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