she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I smell like Dick and happiness
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize