We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
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