It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
