The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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