the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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