So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
