if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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