when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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