Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
i out mim tonsoeep
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