I wish i was in the wii world.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
