I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
