just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
