Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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