have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
