sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
