AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
