The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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