I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
